"The Station" by Robert Hastings
I wanted to take a moment to share with you one of my all time favorite poems, "The Station" by Robert Hastings.
So I invite you to slow down, take this moment, and let the words of Robert Hastings ring loud and clear.
Tucked away in our subconscious minds is an idyllic vision. We see ourselves on a long, long trip that almost spans the continent. We’re traveling by passenger train, and out the windows we drink in the passing scene of cars on nearby highways, of children waving at a crossing, of cattle grazing on a distant hillside, of smoke pouring from a power plant, of row upon row of corn and wheat, of flatlands and valleys, of mountains and rolling hills, of biting winter and blazing summer and cavorting spring and docile fall.-But uppermost in our minds is the final destination. On a certain day at a certain hour we will pull into the station. There sill be bands playing, and flags waving. And once we get there so many wonderful dreams will come true. So many wishes will be fulfilled and so many pieces of our lives finally will be neatly fitted together like a completed jigsaw puzzle. How restlessly we pace the aisles, damning the minutes for loitering … waiting, waiting, waiting, for the station.-However, sooner or later we must realize there is no one station, no one place to arrive at once and for all. The true joy of life is the trip. The station is only a dream. It constantly outdistances us.-“When we reach the station that will be it!” we cry. Translated it means, “When I’m 18, that will be it! When I buy a new 450 SL Mercedes Benz, that will be it! When I put the last kid through college, that will be it! When I have paid off the mortgage, that will be it! When I win a promotion, that will be it! When I reach the age of retirement, that will be it! I shall live happily ever after!”-Unfortunately, once we get it, then it disappears. The station somehow hides itself at the end of an endless track."Relish the moment” is a good motto, especially when coupled with Psalm 118:24: “This is the day which the Lord hath made; we will rejoice and be glad in it.” It isn’t the burdens of today that drive men mad. Rather, it is regret over yesterday or fear of tomorrow. Regret and fear are twin thieves who would rob us of today.-So, stop pacing the aisles and counting the miles. Instead, climb more mountains, eat more ice cream, go barefoot oftener, swim more rivers, watch more sunsets, laugh more and cry less.Life must be lived as we go along. The station will come soon enough.
The Legacy Challenge
I truly believe there is little room for regret in a purpose filled life. I myself work to make it a practice not to dwell on the things I’ve lost a say in, and instead turn my attention to what I can do in the now. Yet, if I’m honest, there are still those regrets that are tougher to shake, but that’s just a part of being human.
With the holidays upon us, I find myself thinking of one of my biggest regrets; I wish I had captured my mom and dad telling their stories in their own words and voices when I had the chance. Now that they’re gone, I’ve come to recognize that having footage of them speaking is something that would be priceless to me today.
This is why I set about creating The Legacy Challenge, because I don’t want anyone to miss out on the opportunity to take hold of stories and wisdom that would be lost otherwise. I can’t go back in time, but I can let my experience propel me to encourage others to not make the same mistake.
As we gear up for time with family and loved ones, there is a perfect opportunity presented to have conversations that matter with the people who matter most. The Legacy Challenge is a real and tangible way to take hold of the stories of those you care about most and keep them as treasures forever.
So what is the Legacy Challenge?
First and foremost, it's free, so no excuses!
Simply put, The Legacy Challenge is an invitation for you to sit down with your loved ones in an interview format and give them the spotlight to share their stories on video. Our team has compiled a list of hand-picked questions that you can download for free by filling out the form below. From there, all you need is a camera and time intentionally set aside to listen. Whether it’s a recording on your phone or a tech savvy someone with a camera is up to you, all that really matters is making it happen.
Why Take The Challenge?
This is your chance to give yourself, your kids, and one day your grandkids a piece of the story that laid the foundations for your family. There are lessons, stories, and thoughts that I guarantee you haven't heard and want to. We don't know what tomorrow holds, but in the moments before us we can be intentional about connecting with and learning from those who have lived more life than we have. The day will come when you can’t just pick up your phone and call your loved ones, and this is how you can have the sound of their voice forever.
Like I said, priceless.
You will never regret hearing and having these stories, so don’t wait!
Create a lasting legacy today.
Lead Well,
Upon entering your name and email you will be able to Download the Legacy Challenge by clicking the button that will appear on the page
The Key to Influencing Others
Influence (verb): to affect or change someone or something in an indirect but usually important way.
The ability to have an effect on others gives you a power that is beyond a job title or the obligation of others to do what you say. It’s a quiet strength that emanates from within you and pulls people in allowing them to listen to your thoughts and inspire them to share in the dreams you hold.
But how do we become influential in our lives? How do we go from another face in the crowd to someone people want to listen to and work with?
We recognize that influence is a direct result of impact.
Influence is not the ability to control someone-but rather the way that our actions, words, and nature compel them to move forward.
Think of the people who have been most influential in your own life-what do you see in them that compels you to be inspired by them? In what way did they carry themselves that made you want to listen to them?
Did they inspire you with their words? Did their attentive listening leave you wanting to be around them more? Did they leave you feeling better than they found you? How did they treat everyone? How did they speak to the group?
There are a number of ways to become influential but it’s important to recognize that influence is not always positive. It isn’t about becoming powerful, it’s about setting yourself apart as a valuable addition to any room you enter into.
Here are three key factors to focus on as you seek to become more influential in your personal life and career:
Decide the Type of Influence You Want to Make
I’m going to go ahead and assume that if you’re reading this blog, you want to be a positive influence. And I know it may seem as if that goes without saying, but the truth is that intentionality will only ever strengthen you in the pursuit of your goals. The bottom line is that everyone is influenced subconsciously by the people around them. The first question you need to ask yourself if you want to be a person who influences the world and people around them is “what kind of influence do I want to make?” Set your intentions and hold yourself to them firmly. Become unwavering in your conviction to be a positive influence to the world and people around you. Your legacy is tied to the type of influence you have on others-how do you want to be remembered, perceived, or known for? That choice is up to you.
How You Carry Yourself
Confidence is noticeable from the moment you enter a space. The way that you position yourself both physically and mentally matters a great deal. This applies to your posture, eye contact, and your way of speaking. Studies have found that standing up straight, keeping your head level, and relaxing your shoulders lends itself to you not only feeling confident-but appearing as such. No matter your appearance, size, or background, you can carry yourself with confidence and authority. People notice these things, from the first impression to the daily interactions, if you want to influence the people around you, carry yourself as such.
The Way You Treat Others
Maya Angelou said it best, “I’ve learned that people will forget what you’ve said, people will forget what you did, but they will never forget the way you made them feel.” When you treat the people around you with respect, authenticity, and kindness you are making an impact. In a world full of busy living and pessimism, joy and kindness stand out. When you treat people well they want to do the same in return-and while that isn’t why you do it, it certainly is a plus. This is one that I could go on and on about, but I think what I love most about it is that influence through positivity is something you don’t need a title or higher salary to bring to the table. And having a reputation for treating people well will always precede you in the best ways.
Conclusion
Influence is not something you are given, it's what you acquire as a result of your intentions and actions. You are only powerful when you choose to be and recognize the abilities you hold that will allow you to step into it. The goal of influence is not to control, but to inspire. No matter where you are in this life, you have the power to impact each and every person you come across.
I hope you'll recognize those capabilities and use them to pursue worthwhile goals.
Lead Well,
Optimism VS Toxic Positivity
Optimism (noun): hopefulness and confidence about the future or the successful outcome of something.
I've talked before on here about the power that optimism has to make you a better leader and person. There is an invaluable strength that comes with the ability to be optimistic in the midst of both struggles and good times-but there are times when positivity can go too far.
There is a line between optimism and toxic positivity that is important to be aware of as you move through this life.
You can be optimistic about the future while still acknowledging the negative things that have happened and allowing yourself to feel-but not be swallowed by-current pain or trials. This is where some people make the mistake of slipping from optimism to toxic positivity.
What is toxic positivity?
A lot of times we don't like to think about the negative things or focus on them-but that doesn't make them go away. Toxic positivity is a state of denial about circumstances that does not serve you or anyone else. It is a belief that no matter how devastating a situation may be, you have to be positive in order to move forward. Negative emotions are rarely comfortable to experience, and those who fall into toxic positivity may be inclined to respond to difficult situations with platitudes of "just focus on the positive" rather than empathy.
Have you ever had someone tell you to "focus on the positive" while you're in the midst of a really hard time?
I'll go ahead and venture to guess that it wasn't the most comforting feedback. And they often mean well, but this kind of thinking will often lead to the recipient of such platitudes feeling disconnected or alienated.
That's because feelings-even the hard ones-are a vital part of the experience of living.
Strength, true strength, is the ability to hold space for those hard feelings and still hold hope that it won't always feel this way. And optimism does not need everything to be perfect in order to persist. The best leaders understand that there are lessons to be learned through hardships that never could have been discovered if things were always perfect. And for that reason, it is a leaders duty not to steer the ship around a problem-but through it-with a confidence that there are calmer waters ahead.
You don't have to force yourself to feel positive in the midst of a trial-and you won't help anyone through a hard time by trying to convince them to ignore what they're rightfully feeling. You can be optimistic while still understanding and feeling pain.
The hard things in this life will continue to come, but we have to be willing to face them if we want to overcome them. And we have to be willing to sit in that discomfort with others if we truly want to support them.
As you move forward in life with the intention to lead, I want to encourage you to face the hard things both in your life and the lives of those you care about. There are connections that can only be made through facing hardships together, and your team, your friends, and your family will grow in strength as you do just that.
Lead Well,
Learning to Lead with Discernment
As leaders, more often than not, the job of making the important decisions is left to us. It can feel daunting to make choices that you know could end in either failure or success, which is why discernment is such a valuable attribute to have as a leader.
Discernment (noun): The ability to judge well, whether in relation to people, situations, or business decisions.
The word comes from the Latin phrase "Discernere" meaning to "separate" or "divide" with the suffix "ment" at the end of the English word meaning "to act." This etymology of the word allows us to have a clearer picture of the goal of discernment; to separate our thoughts and ideas to reveal the heart of issues in order to act accordingly based on what you find.
Discernment in leadership allows you to make decisions based on your personal experience, critical thinking, and engagement with your intuition. When you are faced with a decision or problem, discernment means taking the time to understand not only the problem, but each possible solution in order to find the right match for your company or life.
It's decision making based on what you already know about your team, the failures or successes you've seen play out in the past, and a firm grasp on your goals for the future that will lead you to making choices you can be confident in.
There are some people who seem as if they were born with an innate gift of discernment. Somehow they always know the answers and how they want to move forward. That group however, is not the majority. For most of us, discernment comes with time and intentionality. It takes failure that you work to learn from, and intuition you practice honing to better understand.
Every leader has to make choices, but the best leaders know how to use their discernment in that process.
So then, let's take a look at three ways that you can practice discernment in your own life as a leader:
Examine the Past:
The reason athletes watch tape is to learn from both previous mistakes and successes made in the course of games in order to improve their future performance. As leaders, looking at the past allows us to learn from it, and in doing so, you make your failures mean something. While looking into the past you have the benefit of retrospect that allows you to see things more clearly and spot the root of the problem that led to your solutions success or failure. From there, if you are able to, articulate the heart of these issues you found and the lessons you learned in a few words to help you identify those same root causes in the future.
Learn How Others Think:
There are mistakes you haven't made yet that others have-wouldn't you rather learn from theirs than your own? Think of the leaders you yourself look up to and open yourself up to understanding how they think and act. We're lucky to live in a time where there are endless resources to draw from be it books, podcasts, courses, and speaking events. Don't miss out on the opportunity to learn from others mistakes rather than your own.
Follow Your Intuition:
Think back to the times that you had a gut feeling that turned out to be correct. What did those experiences have in common? What did it feel like to take that leap of faith in your own intuition? How did it feel to learn you were right? Look for patterns in those moments and teach yourself to recognize that small instinctual voice that whispers under the current of your conscious mind-there is oftentimes immense power there. Give yourself a moment to breath and consider the things you already know deep down in order to make a decision you can feel confident in.
Knowing how to make informed decisions that you can be proud of will always be worth the work it takes to achieve discernment.
I hope you'll seek out this valuable skill.
Lead Well,
Identifying What You Can and Cannot Control
The average American spends around 7.5 hours a day on their phones communicating and consuming media. Everyday we wake up and have what feels like the world at our fingertips-but at what cost?
Studies find that 95% of the news stories today are negative in their nature. Now, before I go any further, being informed is important, and understanding what is going on in the world allows you to adapt with the times. But without boundaries and intention, those negative headlines can start to bleed into our everyday lives in the form of stress or misdirection.
So how do we maintain our empathy with all of the horrible things going on in the world while managing the overwhelming nature of all of it?
We learn to identify the things we can do something about as well as the things that are out of our control. Through discerning what is within our capabilities and what is outside of our reach we are able to free ourselves from the burden of feeling responsible for everything going on in the world.
Author of "The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People", Stephen Covey, developed a system of thinking that helps people identify and understand what he calls their Circle of Influence and Circle of Concern. Let's look a little deeper into what these are and how they can help you in your career and life.
The Circle of Concern
Your Circle of Concern is comprised of the things that are worrisome, yet entirely out of your control. These are the things that you can't do anything about yet live in your mind and take up space clouding your vision. All of those negative headlines you read that impact you typically fall into this category. The events happening around the world, economy, the environment, or government affairs. Don't be fooled though, your Circle of Concern can also be filled with topics that are closer to your personally, the only qualifying factor in it is that the problem is not something you can fix right now by yourself. This can include the health of a family member, a difficult neighbor, or even supply chain problems effecting your company.
The Circle of Influence
Your Circle of Influence is identified as the things you can actively do something about at any given moment. These are the things you can begin doing at any point to combat your concerns and create positive change in your life. Through identifying your circle of influence you are empowering yourself to combat your concerns through acting on what you can do rather than dwelling on what you can't. You can't solve all of the worlds problems, but you can change your own life in order to combat them. For example, if you're concerned about the economy, you can start today with choosing to support small businesses, bolster your savings, and work towards making your company adaptable in these shifting times.
The idea is that your circle of influence lies inside of your circle of concern and as time goes on, proactive people will see their circle of concern shrink as their circle of influence grows. Those who live in a reactive mindset will struggle to keep their circle of influence from being swallowed up in their circle of concern as a result of their tendency to focus on what is wrong rather than what they can do on their own.
Start with your circle of concern and write down the things that are overwhelming you, but don't focus too much attention on it-that's not the point! Once you identify what your concerns are you can turn inward and identify your circle of influence through creating actionable solutions that are in your control.
Don't allow what you can't control in life to convince you that you are powerless. It's about recognizing the power you do have instead of lamenting over the power you don't.
There is a quote from author Max Lucado that I feel perfectly encapsulates this mindset, "Not everyone can do everything, but everyone can do something." You are not powerless unless you let yourself believe you are.
So I challenge you to be proactive in your life and mindset and allow yourself to take responsibility for the life you are living. And I implore you to release yourself from the anxiety of the things that are out of your control.
In doing so your mind is free to focus on the here and now.
Lead Well,
Are You Communicating Like a Leader?
Did you know that 90% of all arguments are caused by miscommunication?
One thing that has always driven me crazy when watching movies or tv is when it seems like the whole conflict could be resolved with a conversation between the characters. Often times it's easier to spot a miscommunication from the outside looking in, but when it comes to our own lives it can be harder.
As leaders, minimizing miscommunications allows us to focus on the important things and maintain healthy relationships with those we do work with.
That's where effective communication comes in.
Communication can be simply defined as: A talk, typically an informal one, between two or more people, in which news, ideas, or information is exchanged.
Anyone can have a conversation, but not everyone knows how to communicate like a leader. Effective communication is critical when it comes to gaining trust, aligning efforts, inspiring change, and creating a positive work environment.
A study done in 2015 found that those in leadership roles at varying capacities spend 70-90 percent of their days communicating with others in various degrees.
So...
If you want to lead well, you have to learn how to communicate well. If communication on your end is lacking the odds of information being misinterpreted by your team go up exponentially. In the long run, learning how to communicate well as a leader will save you time, trouble, and mistakes that come as a result of miscommunication.
Attributes of Effective Communication
Clarity
If you've ever had someone give you what feels like a million tasks in one conversation you know how overwhelming it can feel and how easy it is for at least one thing to slip through the cracks. That's why when you are going to communicate with members of your team it's important to pinpoint exactly what you want to get out of the conversation and make it something that can be grasped easily. Clarity allows for the important things to be understood and lends itself to a decreased likelihood of misunderstanding.
Adaption of Communication Style
The way you communicate will rarely be the same way that the people around you do, that's why learning how to adapt your conversation style benefits you as a leader. It's one of the reasons I created The Quiggle Assessment, because everyone has a different leadership style, and understanding your own allows you to meet others where they're at to speak in a way that can be understood well by them. Everyone is different, as a leader, understanding your team and who you're talking to allows you to adapt in order to communicate effectively.
Active Listening
Everyone wants to feel listened to and it's a lot easier than most think to be able to tell if someone isn't paying attention. Your employees know whether you listen to them or not, and if you aren't listening to them, you miss the opportunity to connect and learn from their perspective. As members of your team speak to you, engage in the conversation. Ask questions, take notes, and allow what they tell you to be fully absorbed through being present in the moment.
Empathy
The better you become at understanding and acknowledging the thoughts, feelings, and motivations of your employees the more valued they feel and the stronger their loyalty to you as a leader becomes. Taking into account who you're speaking to and the circumstances behind their actions and words allows you to interpret what they say with an increased ability to understand. It ties directly to emotional intelligence and will lead you to becoming a better leader.
Conclusion
The way you speak to the people on your team matters, and they take not of the things you say and do. Respect isn't given with a job title, it's earned through actions and communicating with empathy, active listening, clarity, and adaption is something that will take your leadership to the next level and strengthen your teams.
Don't just talk about being a good leader, show it in your actions. Communicate in a way that allows you and your team understand one another and excel towards the goals of your company.
Lead Well,
The Dream Interview Method for Landing the Job
Over the last 30 years in business I have had the opportunity to hire incredible people and known the struggle of having to fire others. This position of making these types of decisions has given me a perspective on interviewing that has allowed me to create what I call "The Dream Interview" or LSDD. It's my secret recipe for getting the job amidst a pool of other applicants that I've shared with my own kids and close friends through the years.
And you know what? Every time my kids have used the LSDD interview method they've gotten the job.
Why? Because I know myself that if someone came in for an interview with me and said these things, I would struggle not to offer them the job on the spot. Having made the hard choices in the past that led to employees being let go, I can say with confidence that it is never an enjoyable experience. With that being said, I know that a key to getting hired is making it clear that you will not be the kind of employee that will need to be fired.
On average, there are 118 people who are going for the same job you are, and of that group, only 23% will be brought in for an interview. When you get in the room for that interview you have one chance to make an impression that will land you the job, using this simple framework allows you to do just that.
The Dream Interview
LSDD is an acronym for the four key points that every employer wants to hear. I'm going to break down the four points and then give you an example you can go off of to make your own.
Loyalty
When it comes to hiring, employers want to know that they are finding someone who is not only in it for the paycheck, but because they want to be a member of the team they are applying for. You want to make it clear to the interviewer that you are a team player who will make it your priority to see the common goals of the company come to fruition. Through thick and thin, you will be there to make the company a better place.
Showing Up
Dependability is an invaluable attribute for any employee to display. Making it clear that you are someone who can be taken at your word and will follow through on promises from the start gives you a leg up. Words are only the beginning, but the interview is your chance to make it clear that you prioritize being an employee that can be depended on.
Drama Free
A team relies on everyone working together and doing so with respect and collaboration. Anyone who is coming in as a new member has to be willing, and more importantly able, to work with others. From the jump it's important to make it clear that you are a team player and that you value collaboration. Dispel the fear before it even comes up and be up front about the fact that you will not be the one to cause division in the workplace.
Do What is Expected
You are applying to this job because you know that you are capable of doing what is expected of you and even doing your best to exceed expectations. Not only are you a dependable person, but you are someone who will put in the effort necessary to get your work done and do so with creativity and enthusiasm.
So how do you make all of this clear during an interview?
The point will come in any interview where the floor is yours to "talk a little bit about yourself" and that is your moment to make an impact. Using all four of these points I'm going to give you an example of what that moment of impact can look like.
You can make it your own, but here is an example of LSDD in full:
_____________ let me be clear, I want this job.
And if given this opportunity, I will be loyal to you, and loyal to this company.
I will always have your back.
And I’m going to show up everyday.
You put me on that schedule, and you can always count on me to be there.
And you’ll get 110% of me ready to win everyday.
And I’m going to be drama free. I’m going to try to make your life as easy as possible.
And in the end, I will do what is expected of me, show some creativity, try to exceed your expectations, and look for your leadership along the way to guide me.
Your interview is your one shot to make an impression, and using this LSDD system allows you to cover all of the most important bases. Be the employee you would want to hire and make it clear that you will not be the employee that has to be fired.
Lead Well,
The Meaning of Mentorship
"Mentoring is a brain to pick, an ear to listen, and a push in the right direction." -John Crosby
Oftentimes there is a misconception about leadership that tells us that if we want to lead we have to be willing to do so alone. If this were true, what a lonely road the path to exceptional leadership would be!
I want you to think of your favorite stories and the heroes that are at the center of them, did they do it entirely alone? No! Some of the most iconic characters of all time are the teachers-the mentors. The best heroes and leaders were once led themselves, and I'd argue that their journeys would not have gone very well were it not for the guidance they were given by those who had a bit more experience than them.
Maybe you’re fortunate enough to have a parent or family member you can look too for advice. Maybe you’ve been going at it on your own with the help of others along the way. Maybe you think you don’t need any help or don’t see anyone near you, but to believe that you have all the answers is to deprive yourself of the opportunity to learn and grow. There is a quiet and steady strength that comes with the humility that allows us to accept advice from those who may know more than we do.
That is why mentorship is so important.
A mentor is someone who teaches or gives help and advice to a less experienced and often younger person.
Mentorship is the influence, guidance, or direction given by a mentor to a mentee.
Finding someone who has walked the very path you yourself are setting out on is not only an advantage, but a privilege that should be invested in once the opportunity presents itself. When you are able to find a mentor who's life reflects the values and victories you yourself want to achieve you have found an invaluable resource for not just your career, but your life.
I talk a lot about the idea of your "Kitchen Cabinet" and the importance of having a core group of individuals you can go to for advice and guidance-and a mentor is a perfect addition to any kitchen cabinet.
A good mentor can lead to increased confidence, leadership skills, and improved emotional health.
The trick then, is to find one.
If you or someone you love are looking to find a mentor, knowing where to look is important. Figure out what it is you want to do and as you aim yourself in that direction, look for people who are a couple years ahead of you on that journey. Start a dialogue with this person and be consistent and thoughtful in your outreach. Form a relationship first and let the rest happen naturally.
If it's someone you already know personally, it can start as simply asking them to lunch or coffee with the preface being you want to pick their brain. Go in with respect and the desire to learn and listen, and then do just that. Allow yourself to be a student again.
Mentorship is incredible because it allows for the transfer of knowledge from one generation to the next. And there's a cycle to it, because one day you get to repay the blessing through becoming a mentor yourself one day.
Leadership is a matter of connection, not power, and through mentorship we can see each generation lifted up to become exceptional leaders themselves.
Maybe you're the one looking for a mentor or maybe this blog made you think of the person who once was your mentor who you want to honor through passing on their kindness. Whatever it is, I hope that you are challenged to create authentic connections as you pursue whichever goal it is you're chasing.
Lead Well,
The Power of Gratitude
Gratitude (noun): The quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness.
The oxford dictionary defines the word "grateful" as "showing an of appreciation of kindness." That definition is where the differentiation between being grateful and thankful lies. Being thankful implies a feeling while being grateful is an action.
You've been saying "thank you" since you learned how to talk, most likely under the instruction of your parents or teachers. It's the polite thing to do-but what if I told you that being polite is the bare minimum?
What if I challenged you to be grateful on the 364 days of the year that aren't Thanksgiving?
What if...
I told you that being grateful is less about everything being perfect and more about YOU being present to notice the things that are beautiful around you?
And let me be clear, this isn't a cross stitched pillow message in your grandmas house telling you to "Be Grateful" because it's the "nice thing to do". The truth is that gratitude is a powerful tool in a negative world. When we are capable of finding the people and things around us that we can be grateful for, we are able to then live happier lives both in the short and long term.
Studies on Gratitude
Psychologically speaking, gratitude is commonly associated with greater happiness. This is because when you are intentionally practicing gratitude you are choosing to focus on the positive aspects of your day to day in a conscious manner. It allows us to relish the positive moments in our days and work through adversity with a clearer mind.
A study was done in 2017 that split participants into two groups with different sets of instructions. One group was instructed to write down things they found throughout their days to be grateful for while the other was asked to write down what they found to be negative during their days. After just 10 weeks the positive group was found to have had fewer doctors visits, exercise more consistently, and generally happier.
Managers who were instructed to thank their employees frequently found that over time their employees performed at a higher level with more motivation than before.
Couples that consistently showed gratitude towards each other for the things done in the relationship have been found to have more productive disagreements and and less at that.
Through gratitude it isn't just your life that improves, but the lives of those you spend your days with as well. When you choose to practice gratitude you are centering your life around the things you have found to be good-the benefits therefor stem from the mindset.
How Can You Practice Gratitude
Keep a Gratitude Journal: It can be as simple as a designated note on your phone or doodles on a spare sheet of paper. It doesn't matter where you write down the things you're grateful for, what matters is that you're seeking them out. Start with three things everyday and try to make them different. Through doing this consistently, you are training your brain to subconsciously seek the good things around you.
Be Present: You have to look around you to see both the good and bad. A lot of times the bad things are easier to spot as they seem to intrude on us when we don't want or didn't ask for them. That being said, if you want to find the beautiful things in this life, you have to not only want to find them, but immerse yourself in the present in order to do so.
Limit Your Complaining: Complaining is a habit, and that means you can break it. Intentionally replace your negative comments with either positive ones, or maybe just don't say anything at all. You're allowed to be annoyed or angry about things, but those moments steal our lives when we make them the focus of our days. Practice stating the positive things you see rather than the negative.
Thank Someone: Odds are, every person who has impacted your life for the better doesn't know they helped you. A tangible and powerful way to practice gratitude, is making your gratitude for the people in your life known to them. When they cross your mind, even if you haven't spoken in a while, you can reach out-yes, out of the blue! Maybe your message will save them from a bad day or encourage them onward, you never know if you don't try.
At the end of the day, If you are unable to be grateful for at least one thing everyday, odds are that you aren't looking hard enough. It can be that cold glass of water after a workout you got to guzzle down or the sheets you woke up lying under. The positive things in life aren't always massive or monumental, most commonly, the beauty is in the details, so if you struggle with gratitude, try looking a little closer.
Through making gratitude a daily practice your relationships, work life, and well being will improve.
I hope you look for the small and big things to be grateful for.
Lead Well,